In my last article, I argued for everyday social activism: that we are being called to act in accordance with what we value. I wrote it in the context of the U.S. presidential election, but if you’ve hung around me at all, you know I believe in activism in a much broader sense. I want us all to become the activists we are meant to be.
I’ve done a lot to support others in that journey, so I’ll share some highlights of what can help you embrace your activist self. However, I also want to share some of my own journey as an activist, because I know first-hand how convoluted that process can be and how we need to weave activism into our daily lives, rather than treating it as something we do as a discrete task.
Social Activism is Especially Important for Sensitive, Idealistic People
But first, why does social activism matter?
Our wellness, individually and collectively, depends on people acting in accordance with prosocial values: love, equality, respect, freedom, responsibility, interdependence. These are the basics, things we learned in kindergarten, from Mr. Rogers. Social activism, at its core, is about upholding these values in a variety of contexts.
You and I, as holders of these values, can make a positive impact on the world by standing up for them when they are threatened, trampled, cast aside. In the process of doing so, we can also support our own wellbeing (you read a sampling of the research confirming the mental health benefits of values-based actions here and here).
Not everyone is comfortable embracing the activist label. Some people reject it as countercultural (although to those people, I would ask: do you really feel comfortable identifying with the today’s culture?). Other people, including me, struggle to self-identify as activists because we worry that we aren’t doing enough, or that our lifestyle isn’t countercultural enough.
So, let’s take a moment to find common ground in the language we use. An activist is someone who is working for change. Period. While we may hear “activist” and envision a celebrity animal rights spokesperson or an internationally known peace advocate, all of us have the potential to be activists for change. That change can start where we are, with the resources we have. Small changes matter, too. Most of us will never donate millions or make a career out of activism, but we can still be activists. Whatever we value is calling for our support, and when we are sensitive, idealistic people, this call is impossible to ignore.
We cannot rely on a road map to becoming an activist. There is a tremendous amount of freedom to do it your own way. However, that freedom can be paralyzing, especially for the idealists who want so desperately to “get it right” and make a difference.
Singularly Sensitive is a Toolbox for Activism
My Singularly Sensitive approach emerged as a way for people like you and me—big hearted, sometimes to a fault—to bring all this headiness back down to earth. I knew that it was possible to figure out how to live our values without burning out, getting overwhelmed, or collapsing in despair at the magnitude of all there is to tackle in the world. We didn’t need a one-size-fits-all approach, but rather a set of tools to navigate our unique way forward. Those tools are explore, experiment, and integrate.
First, we explore our inner landscape. We clarify our values, how they have evolved over time, what we know about ourselves as people, and what we know about the world around us. We can take stock of both successes and failures to reach past goals, ways that we lack resources to support our activism, and strategies that we have yet to try. If you’re passionate about the environment, you might think about what types of activism you’ve done, what groups you’re a member of, or where you have thought a lot about doing something without yet following through. There’s no need to get critical or judgmental. The goal of all this introspection is to uncover a direction for your next step.
That next step happens in the experiment phase. We can set a micro goal for taking action. I see so many people try to reach for the stars in the experiment phase, instead of taking one small step at a time. By all means, aim for the stars, but don’t set yourself up for failure by expecting you’ll reach them with the first thing you try. Start by doing one small thing differently. Sticking with the environmental activism scenario, setting out alone on an indefinite protest in the wilderness is probably not going to prepare you for success. Instead, choose something that feels like it pushes you just a hair beyond your comfort zone—enough to stretch, not enough to get overwhelmed. You might decide to join a group that is having a daylong awareness-raising event in your community. Then see what happens. There are NO failures when we experiment! Much like a scientist, you’re collecting data to see what happens.
You’ll analyze that experimental data in the integrate phase. What did you learn from what happened? How will you adjust your goals for next time? What did you discover about yourself that helps you envision a path forward that is more congruent with who you are and what you believe? In our environmental activism example, you might have noticed that you were a natural at talking to people walking by about why you are protesting. Or maybe you weren’t a natural, but you liked it enough to want to do it better in the future. Perhaps you discovered that the shouting and waving signs set your nerves on edge, making it hard to tolerate being at the site, despite feeling even more committed to the mission of the group. Again, being nonjudgmental is a key to using what you’ve learned to continue exploring and experimenting. Perhaps you’ll look into where to practice speaking in public, so you feel more confident at the next rally, or you’ll decide to find some ways to volunteer behind the scenes.
There are no right or wrong ways to be an activist. The question is: are you acting congruently with what you value?
There are no right or wrong ways to be an activist. The question is: are you acting congruently with what you value?
My Activist Journey as a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP)
I’ve struggled throughout my life with that sense of not doing enough or not doing the right kinds of activism (as if there are only certain things that need to be done). Personally, it’s because I have very high ideals and see how vast the steps are that we need to take to reach those ideals. Like many of you, I have a hard time setting a micro goal and trusting that it matters, that it is enough. Singularly Sensitive was born out of what I needed, as much as what my clients needed. And so, I’ll share my journey with you, in the hope that you may see something of yourself in me and learn from my stumbles.
In my teens and twenties, my activism was often public facing: marching in protests, speaking at peace rallies, making human chains at sit-ins, giving interviews to news media, joining groups at various causes, fundraisers, awareness events. This scratched my itch to feel like I was doing something in a visible way. It also rooted me in communities of people who were trying to accomplish the same goals. There is nothing like sitting with more experienced members of a movement or organization, listening to their stories and their advice, to buoy your spirits in the face of discouragement, obstacles, and the slow pace of change. However, I struggled with feeling uncertain whether my actions were making a tangible difference, moving the needle forward toward our goals.
My thirties were a time of recalibrating what activism could look like in my life. A chronic health issue moved from background noise to the forefront, meaning that my body was no longer capable of full-day marches or spending a weekend sleeping on a bus to a distant protest site. I became a mother, which changed how I viewed the consequences of potentially getting arrested at a protest. Instead, I connected with people who were involved in the organizational side of activism. I began doing more behind-the-scenes work to support the field teams working with the public. I also had opportunities to do more activism within my career, advocating for clients, participating in suicide awareness and college mental health activism, and working for changes in how psychologists are trained. In all these roles, I could see the impact of my action on organizations and people, even if the big picture issues may not have improved. However, I had to work through a lot of feelings about changing my ways of participating in activism and get over a sense of having “sold out” by being less visible.
My professional activism has continued through my forties. I’ve taken a certain degree of delight in pushing back against the old guard in my field that believe in the “neutral” façade of a psychologist. Aside from the fact that I’m too old to bite my tongue about what I believe, the idea that psychologists should remain neutral in the face of societal factors that are detrimental to health is abhorrent to me. Singularly Sensitive is one way that I’ve used the letters behind my name to point to a higher calling for psychology based on values and community. This is also a time in my life where I have been more able to make decisions to “vote with my dollar” than I was in the past, although it disappoints me that I cannot make all of my purchases that way. I appreciate having the privilege of being able to make small but recurring donations to my local public radio station and several community groups. And I continue to support organizations in the community whose values align with mine. It’s been exciting to make new connections within the political, social justice, and activist communities that have been emerging in the last four years.
Writing is My Revolution as an Activist
Throughout my life, writing has been my consistent tool of activism. It started in elementary school, when we wrote letters to the president about what we, as children, believed the future should be. That was also my first lesson in not getting a response and not seeing my letter effect change. It continued in high school, when my advanced math class wrote daily letters to Mattel to protest their “math class is tough” Barbie. I learned then the value of a mentor, our dear teacher Mrs. Wintrode, who not only helped us compose letters that were more eloquent than the “what the (bleep)?” reaction we had as teens, but who agitated the school administration to not only let us eat lunch in her class to write the letters, but got the school to fund the postage as a student enrichment supply.
I didn’t realize how much I’ve come to embrace writing as a form of social activism until recently, when my husband and son laughed (good-naturedly) at my announcement that I was going to write a letter to the school district about a recent issue. They pointed out that this is my predictable response to seeing a problem in the world. They know that my words will be direct and to the point. I have no fears about how my letter (email) will be received, unlike many areas of life where anxiety is a faithful companion. Something of a righteous anger inspires my confidence and motivates me to put pen to paper or fingers to keyboard without censoring myself.
More and more, I’m doing the same here on Substack. There is space here for me to bring all of myself, instead of fighting to stay in the narrow box that psychology prescribes. And I’ve felt enough support and community here that I feel confident that I am not alone, even when someone unsubscribes or lets me know I’m not their cup of tea. That’s fine. I don’t need everyone to like me (another gift of midlife!).
Writing isn’t enough for me, but it is a very good start when I’m trying to act according to what I believe. It’s my revolution, and I’m proud of it. The danger I’ve seen in myself and others is that we may feel a sense of relief for venting our righteous anger through writing, leading to some complacency. I think it’s fine to take a break after we write. But then, in that spirit of the Singularly Sensitive approach, we need to ask ourselves what we’ve learned and what are we going to do next.
How to Be an Everyday Social Activist
I want you to be an activist for what you value. I believe that it’s the only thing that will make you well, and the bonus is that will help improve the world at the same time. But lest you get lost in the weeds, I’ll leave you with some bullet points about what it takes to be an activist in a way that fits your life:
· Honesty about who you are and what your capacity is
· Self-acceptance and gentleness to replace judgment, self-criticism, and comparisons to other people
· Willingness to evolve your activism as you, your life, and the needs of the world change
· Support from mentors who can encourage you and a community to which you can give back some of what you have received from it
If you feel like you have nothing to give that would make a difference as an activist or you feel too paralyzed, discouraged, or cynical to try, please reach out. I believe that our world is going to get better to the same extent that each of us is acting on prosocial values. Your contribution is vital. We are waiting for you!
Your reflection on the essence of activism resonates deeply with me, especially as we navigate different cultural landscapes. The idea that activism can take many forms, from grand gestures to small, consistent actions, aligns with my experience of engaging in social activism across different countries.
In Germany, for example, activism often feels more reserved, rooted in a desire for social order and avoiding confrontation, whereas in the U.S., there seems to be more space for bold and visible expressions of dissent. I have felt more socially accepted in the U.S., where public activism is encouraged and often celebrated, compared to Germany, where I have sometimes felt resistance to embracing activist identities.
Yet, your emphasis on authenticity and personal alignment with one’s values transcends these cultural differences. It reminds me that activism doesn't have to look a certain way—it only needs to reflect who we truly are and what we stand for. I appreciate your invitation to redefine activism in a way that resonates with our unique capacities and contexts.
Thank you for reminding us that every action, big or small, can contribute to a collective shift, and that finding our own way to contribute is what truly matters.
Great article Lori, very well grounded in experience, wisdom and commitment to social values. So helpful to unpack the terms activism and activist.